not a pretty girl

a new person with each new experience

Thursday, April 22, 2004

booterstown coast

The seaweed is taken in by my senses which draws contrary emotions that I’m accustomed to having together. This scene is straight out of The Ulysses in the fifties.
I’m sure there are more lights and perhaps more graffiti but little more has changed.
A train to Bray another one to town, lads slagging over a game of football and the tide a mile out.
The tears accompany the peace, industrial Dublin in contrast with small town church all in the same view.

A bird flies low to the ground.
There must be comfort in knowing that you can soar, be free all the while keeping the protective grounds energy at your breast.
Shelter from the wind, the same wind that takes you away.

The light house flashes and I feel in love.
I rarely need an other to feel this way.
It is always life that I am in love with, people, places, things add to the sensations;
I share this love of life with others.
When I say I love you, I’m referring to the love of life we share at that moment.

Another train, another flash of light, another cheer, a flock of chirping playful birds and a deep sigh.

A man climbs the same route that I took but turns hastily in the other direction;
he knows where he is going, perhaps his daily walk.
Some have a mission, I just wonder.
The sun has set, a cool breeze descends;
I shall continue my journey and leave this place in tact has it was fifty years ago.

Wednesday, April 21, 2004

today is one of those where I just love people. It is one of those days that people are just really nice and you just feel good about all the people you have choosen to be close to you in your world. I would say with all the acquantances here I have made three real friends (besides ready), and today I eat lunch with one of them, chatted on the phone with another and studied and hung out with the third. On my way home I ran into the one flat mate that I really get along with and chatted for a bit before she headed over to her boyfriends house and then came home to find the best care package that ever existed from sal. It really is the best! then I check my email and this new collective had just started called "drop e not bombs", not sure who started it, it might have been ready but I think it might have been this guy daren. darren is great, yeah he is SWP and tends to preach on occation but I always have so much fun with him.

I'm sitting here eating licorise listening to the "mellow mix" sal sent me. I'm going to take the night of studying, got tons done today and all I want to do is bake in the glow of the day. Perhaps light my new candle, read my new magazine, and listen to my new cd.

Tuesday, April 20, 2004

I got a letter today from the registrar, the women who was to investigate the complaint I made about the email that said; "its one thing to be deviant its another to try to convince people that it is ok". The letter I got was a copy of a report sent to the President. It details the investigation process, which I now realize was held up solely by the lecturer who sent the email. The registrar found that it was resonable to "construe (a) that the message was directed for her. . . (b) that the message was accusing her of wrongdoing . . . it was not unreasonable for Ms Marven to take offence at the message."

the way he tried to back peddle out of this one is great he said that "he has not fully withdrawn Ms Marven's letter from the envelope, has not see Ms Marven's name and email address at the bottom of the letter but had addressed his responce to the e-mail address on the sticker attached to the top of the letter." brillant claim ignorance but allas it didn't work and he was asked to appologize. He refused to do so and said that "it would conflict with his principles to offer an apology".

the final line of the report says "following my conversation with Mr Byrnes, I fear tht he may not agree to conciliation, and disciplinary action may be indicated."


thats such a strange line 'diciplinary action may be indicated' . . . thats her recommendation. indicate diciplinary action. INDICATE . . .

lets see if it takes another two months to finish this off.

Monday, April 19, 2004

with less than a week to go for my essays and then a mad rush to study for my exam you would wonder why I would even bother with grassroots, mayday and love. Well its because I am drawn by other factors then just a rational mind OR I am weak. The grassroots stuff is happening and I really want to be involved and help out with firstaid workshops so I say YES. Mayday is coming up everything sounds like so much fun so I work around the events. And now the boy - he wants to get back, says he was a rash spa, was in a mood but instead of dealing with it or talking about it he just said lets break up, he says that when he was saying it he wanted to take it back. Love is a mad thing, god I hope he doesn't do this to me again . . . my heart can't take much more, but when things are casual they are really good so YES I am going over to his house tonight.