new developments indead

after reading sals blog about working in production at a famous bondage/fetish store in san fransico my new developments seem almost unwothwhile mentioning. Nothing will be as exciting as a queer kid moving to queer mecca and within a few weeks working at a queer dream job. my new developments are quite the opposite of salvos queer world. so ready a few weeks ago had the talk differentiating between sleeping together and seeing each other. to my delight he was the first one to say that he felt that we were seeing each other and not sleeping together. Then last week he brought that converstion up it felt like he was going in the direction of boyfriend-girlfriend talk, but I was not ready to go there yet and he was not willing to put it out there and be rejected so it was left unsaid. But I realized I do refer to him in my mind as my boyfriend, and I have told a few people about him saying the words boyfriend just because it was simplier. Yet the past week it just became blatently clear that we arn't just casually seeing each other, that we do see a history in our relationship (not some crazy long term plan but a feeling that we will still be together throughout this year) SO I brought it up much like I did the first time about the sleeping together and seeing each other conversation. We started to talk about the diffianitions between the two things. When the deffinitions where out I said that I thought of him in my mind in terms of a boyfriend and not just seeing each other. He agreed and we happily embraced the term . . . then i sat back and said "you wont introduce me only as your girlfriend will you? or talk about me this people that know me as your girlfriend" ahhhh I suddently realized the implications on lost of identity these things could have. and although i really doubt ready would ever do either of those things (being an anarchist and all - the autonimist self being essential and distruction of hierachies) i still felt the need to clarify. and I was right he said the only difference in terms of using the term would be when people who didn't know me asked what he was doing tonight he would say going to his girlfriends house and not his mates house. that made me happy enought, there were physical threats of viollence if he started to refer to me as his girlfriend to mutual friends and aquantances.

so there you have it, I have a boyfriend, he is cool with the poly thing, but at the same time I think it will be a while before any poly worlds are truely explored, we are at the discusting stage right now where we spend devestationg huge amounts of time together, and never get sick of each other. There are only 3 nights that we didn't spend the night together in the past week and a half, but don't worry we did chill at some point of those days.

so other news . . .

this random guy found my blog the other day and it was slightly disconserting. I have not told anyone my link to the blog here yet, I really want people to get to know me first and not through my blog entries. I have been very conscious to this, so when this guy came up to me at a party the other day and said that he had found my blog (he didn't even know that I had one) it really shocked me, this guy ran the anti-deprotation campaign on campus - and he said he was doing searches online to see who was talking about it - and well I have posted about it a few times, so appartently my blog came up . . . with my face . . . and suddenly exposing myself unknowing to the guy who when ever he seeing me on campus points and says booo canada, or booo punks or just booo. how very strange indead the joker has more insight then the boyfriend!!